The ABC's of Parenting

There will never be a book, blog, or article that will prepare you for being a parent. Everyone will have their advise and wisdom to share with you. Appreciate what everyone has to say, and know that every child is different. Even in the same family - what works with one kid may not work with another. One thing I have learned, 3 babies later, is that parenting can feel tough, often. One common thing among all parents is that we all feel the same at some point - like we may not be good enough. Or maybe we aren't qualified to do this. Or - wow, I really screwed up... how about this one - Did I really just yell at my kid for spilling water? Life. Work. Marriage. Relationships. Unwanted drama. We all have it. No matter where you grew up or how you were raised, chances are, in today's world, you are experiencing some form of Stress! So instead of trying to write the Rights and Wrongs of parenting or condemning everyone else of something I probably did yesterday, I felt led to write a list of Reminders for all parents. No matter how old your children are. I think this list will apply to us all.

Always love your children. No matter what. God gave them to you on purpose.
Be easy on yourself. Nobody has parenting down to an art. Every child is different.
Care about everything they have to say, one day they may not want to share anything with you.
Don't doubt your abilities. A bad day doesn't make you a bad parent or a bad person.
Every day will seem long, cherish them because the years are short.
Forgive them quickly - no, immediately. They are just little kids.
Give them lots of love, hugs, kisses, and fun memories. They deserve a great childhood.
Hear what they are telling you. They are usually pretty funny people.
Inspire them to be like Christ. Teach them to give and also love others.
Just have fun with them, no matter what you are doing together.
Keep your priorities straight - don't spend hours cleaning when you could be spending time with them.
Learn to love every stage of every age, even the terrible 2's. You will miss them when they are teens.
Make time for each child, each day, to tell them how awesome they are and that you love them.
Never allow your mistakes to define you. Allow God's Word to define you.
Open your heart to them. They will pour into you.
Pray for them and with them daily. They will learn to pray on their own quickly.
Quit thinking about what you should have done - it's in the past.
Respect your parents more for raising you - now you see how tough it was.
Say your sorry when you mess up. They are always quick to forgive.
Talk to them about their day and about their future. Explore their imagination.
Understand what they are going through. Remember how you felt at their age.
Value the time you do have. Don't allow busyness to keep you from bonding.
Worry not - trust in the Lord. He has it all under control.
Xpect things to go differently than planned, and don't freak out when they do.
You will not be able to be a perfect parent, and that's okay.
Zip it when you feel the urge to yell. Just breathe and walk away. You won't regret that.

I wish letter Y didn't apply. I wish I could be that perfect parent. However, on this earth, that's not possible. Learning to accept that we make mistakes can be tough. Many of these are a work in progress for myself. No matter how many times we mess up though, just remember you aren't the only parent in the world feeling ashamed or regretting something you just did. Slow down and pray. Allow your Heavenly Father to help you, for He created you and knows you more than you know yourself.

Dear Diary - Love Chloe

October 15th, 2013. This was the day I was born. (2 weeks before I was expected) On the left are my 2 brothers and 2 of my grandparents, on the right is my daddy. This was a good day, everyone was happy and taking pictures of me. In fact, they are still taking lots of pictures of me... maybe I'm famous.

I am now a week old and they say my hair is a little on the wild side. I hear Malachi (the rough one) had the same issue. Maybe that Johnson and Johnson guy could make a product for baby hair soon, that would be totally awesome!



This is a picture of my daddy trying to comfort me. God gave me 2 older brothers to watch over me and protect me from mean boys, but right now they are just being way too LOUD for me and my head is killing me! Isn't it past their bedtime anyways? I will get them back for this one day.

Today I am 10 days old. Yesterday I lost that silly plastic thing attached to my belly. However, mommy says it was too soon because it was still bleeding some. Thanks to my pamper though, it's gone (and I'm happy because it would scratch my tummy). So now that it's gone I get to experience, "the bath." The first one was not a great experience. I actually cried... but it didn't last long and once I was wrapped up and changed into fresh clothes and a new diaper, I felt pretty good.

Day 13 - this happened. An 8 week old boxer. Daddy really wanted her... not sure why because I am a newborn and I'm supposed to be getting all the attention in the house! - I'll stop there, you may gather your own opinion on this white thing. ugh.

It's official - I'm 2 weeks old and mother is a mess. She sees that I am getting bigger already so she decided to snap some shots of me with this sign, I'm told I'll be posing for this "timeline photo" often. First time wearing shoes too, and Joshua (my oldest brother) is concerned that I get to wear shoes in the house and he doesn't. That's right big bro, the baby is already getting special privileges! Get used to it. - boo yah (I really don't talk like this by the way)


 So mom decided to play a little dress up one day... I can't believe she put this shirt on me. I know everyone poops, but who wears a shirt about it? I really hope this doesn't go public. So to make sure it didn't stay on me, I projectile vomited all over myself, that'll teach her.

Then it gets worse. My mom dressed me up as a mouse named Minnie. I'm a baby, not a mouse! Who likes mice anyways? People run and scream when they see a mouse. Soon enough I will be able to talk and I will kindly explain that I would like to pick out my own clothes.

Not sure if this is any better but I was told I wouldn't be the only one "dressed up" on this day. They called it Halloween. I'm a cupcake - which is better than the mouse because cupcakes are sweet like me and people don't run from them. Say cheese! - oh wait, that's what those mice eat...

So here we are, all 5 of us (minus the dog). They said it was a fun night, I wouldn't know. Napping seemed more important so that's exactly what I did. Frequent naps is also another privilege I get from being the baby. Mom and dad try to get those in too but between me and the dog, we make sure they stay awake - I call it being productive. 

Chloe Rebekah

Chloe Rebekah

On October 15th, 2013, Miss Chloe Rebekah joined our family. She arrived at 6:26 pm weighing in at 8 lbs 2 oz and 20 in long. I'd like to call her my miracle baby, but really all babies are miracles. She is the result of an answered prayer. 

As an emotional pregnant woman at the age of 23, delivering my 2nd son (Sept 09), my heart ached because I knew I wasn't done having children but my husband was set on just the 2 boys for several reasons. I can't blame him really, the boys were only 15 months apart (surprise!) and rumor has it that hormonal pregnant women aren't easy to live with. (I'll have to research that one, I thought I was just glowing and radiant, right?) Oh yeah, and apparently kids cost money - who knew? I desired to have a daughter, for myself and for my husband. You always hear about daddy's little girl. I felt like if we never had a daughter we were both missing out on a huge blessing. 

I prayed a lot about the situation and gave it to God. If it wasn't meant to be for us to have a daughter then I would be okay with that, but my heart longed for this daughter to be. I wasn't the only one that went to God about this, my sweet firstborn began asking for a sister around the age of 3. I told him he needed to pray for a sister and left it at that. The next time he brought it up I informed him once again to keep praying. His response was, "But why? I already prayed." I said well just keep praying buddy. Months went by and he brought up having a sister once again, I  said buddy what if we had another boy though? His witty answer, "Mom, if we had 3 boys, that would be a joke!" - Well son, I see your point! This then turned into him asking about what to name this sister (who is yet to be conceived). So I began thinking of women in the bible, hence we all have biblical names. The first name I thought of was Rebekah. So he was set, we will name her Rebekah. (We told him we couldn't name her Rebekah because daddy has a cousin with that name). He didn't care, he would draw pictures of his sister Rebekah playing in the snow and speak of her often. 

Then came the unthinkable in August of 2012. My husband comes to me and says, once Z starts school, I'm done having kids. This was his way of saying lets have a baby without really saying it. (which meant we had 1 year to conceive a child) So in February of 2013 we found out we were expecting. Oddly enough I wasn't completely ecstatic upon learning this. I had a bit of fear for some reason, maybe it was the thought of my body changing again or the possibility that it could be twin boys! The joy eventually crept in and the fear subsided. Then the moment of truth came on June 3rd. I was hoping for a girl but deep down I just knew that I would hear the words, "you're baby is a boy," because I felt that I was just destined to have all boys making me crazy climbing every wall and jumping off of countertops for years to come. However, I was never so happy to be wrong! It was a girl! (still with some unbelief I had to double check at the following ultra sound and I was able to see her ovaries, something a boy wouldn't have and I was then completely convinced)

Through the faith of a child, my faith increased. Z told me, "it's a girl I know it is," even when I suggested the possibility that God would give us another boy. I am so grateful that God would bless our family with this precious little girl. All I could think of was Psalm 37:4 "Delight yourself also in the Lord and He shall give you the desires of your heart."

I know any mother could probably agree that there are times you will look at your newborn and just cry tears of joy and thankfulness that God would entrust you with this tiny bundle of joy. Even though you are so exhausted and covered in spit-up (among other things),  you wouldn't have your life any other way. 

Praise be to God, my cup is definitely running over.

**and by the way, daddy chose Chloe's first name and we didn't decide on a middle name until after she was born, thanks to Z, our Chloe Rebekah is here**